Tag Archives: lying

Setting The Record Straight

I had planned to let this go. I had gone quietly when asked to leave Rigg’s blog, but several days later he was still running his mouth about me.

I could not possibly care less about childish name-calling or other typical trolling, but when someone continually makes misleading comments insinuating that I am dishonest or otherwise attempting to cast doubt on my character, integrity and motives, it’s time to fight back. This is not so much about defending myself, because I know my record speaks for itself, but about letting Rigg and people like him know that they won’t get away with it, that their slurs and smears will not be allowed to stand.

A little history first:

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Saturday Cartoons: McCain’s Gaslighting

Jane Smiley at The Huffington Post wrote an interesting piece entitled Gaslight.

Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse. It involves an increasing frequency of systematically withholding factual information from, and/or providing false information to the subject, having the gradual effect of making the victim anxious, confused, and less able to trust his or her own memory and perception.

Wikipedia

Someone who is gaslighting might also look you in the eye and lie to you about you, or about something he knows you know is a lie.

From Jane Smiley’s article:

Knowing that we know what they know, they now tell us we’re crazy, that black is white and cats are dogs and John McCain is a maverick and Sarah Palin is a tax cutter (hear the one about Sarah P. leaving the town of Wasilla with 19 million dollars in long term debt? You did? No, you didn’t, darling. You must be imagining things)

And now for our Saturday cartoon, Oh, McCain from Lunatics and Liars:


Getting To Know You – Part III

Welcome to Part III of Getting To Know You, a series dedicated to discussing some of the questions and concerns regarding online dating and long distance relationships. I have been in a long distance relationship for over seven years, and recently married my long distance Love. I am writing from my own personal perspective, and hope it will benefit those who are following along.

Despite the fact that online and long distance relationships are becoming more and more common, there is still considerable controversy surrounding the topic. My goal is to help promote a more balanced and positive view of online and long distance relationships by addressing some of the questions and concerns that I encounter most frequently.

In Part I, I addressed the question, “How can you fall in love with someone you don’t even know?” and explained my thoughts on what it is to truly know someone. In Part II, I discussed questions regarding liars and psychos on the internet. Now I would like to talk about a couple of things that may sound funny or superficial at first, but are legitimate concerns that deserve a genuine response:

What if the person you’ve fallen in love with online has bad breath or body odor problems?

What if it turns out that you’re not sexually compatible?

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Getting To Know You – Part II

Welcome to Part II of Getting To Know You, a series in which I will address some of the questions and concerns people have regarding online and long distance relationships. My purpose in taking on this project is to share a different perspective on this slightly controversial topic. If possible, I would like to help remove the stigma attached to these kinds of relationships.

I am a firm believer that consenting adults should be able to engage in any kind of relationship that makes them happy. I also understand the skepticism regarding online and long distance relationships, but having been in a committed and successful long distance relationship for seven years which has resulted in a recent marriage, I hope I can shed new light on a few things.

In Part I of this series, I discussed what I feel it means to truly know another person. It was in response to the question, “How can you fall in love with someone you don’t even know?” While it directly inspired the title of that particular post, I believe the title suits the series just as well – it is about getting to know a different side of the issue, as well as the people involved.

I would like to address a couple more questions I have encountered regularly over the years. I believe they can be answered in the same or a similar way, so I will tackle them together:

How do you know the person you’ve met online isn’t lying to you? How do you know he isn’t a psycho?

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Getting To Know You

Recently, while browsing through other blogs, I noticed that the topic of people meeting and/or dating online is quite a hot one. Although there is a lot of it going on, there are still those who are quite skeptical and even critical of this type of interaction.

While some can be downright nasty about it, other people seem to have legitimate concerns and likewise raise legitimate questions; questions that I had too, before I found myself falling in love with a man I had never seen face to face.

Mike and I have been in a long distance relationship for a little over seven years, and were married this past March. When we met online, neither of us was looking for a relationship; it just naturally grew into one. Our love has grown stronger every day since then, and we are deeply committed to each other and our marriage. We have overcome numerous obstacles, and each one has brought us closer and made our relationship even more solid.

It seems to me that maintaining a long distance relationship, especially one as long distance as ours (he’s in the U.K. and I’m in the U.S.), requires extra levels of commitment, dedication and trust. There are also certain sacrifices that a couple must be willing to make; sacrifices much different to those required in traditional relationships.

That said, I would like to address some of the questions and concerns that I’ve encountered recently and over the years. Of course, my thoughts on the subject are based solely on my own personal experience and success story, if you will. They are, however, thoughts which I have examined extensively for more than seven years and discussed at great length with my wonderful husband for just as long. I will begin with the question that inspired the title of this post:

How can you fall in love with someone you don’t even know?

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