Monthly Archives: October 2015

Cry Baby Cop, Michael Holsworth

So, there I was minding my own goddamned business, drinking coffee and trying to read the news when my actual news reading was completely disrupted by a pathetic, self-serving sob story from one of Kansas City’s finest. His name is Michael Holsworth and according to his Facebook page, he has been a cop for thirteen years and proudly proclaims that, “When guns are outlawed, I will be an outlaw.” Here is the profile photo that Holsworth used to publicly declare that he will do what the fuck he wants, the law be damned:

Outlawed Guns

Not surprising from a cop these days — don’t like the law, just fucking break it. No skin off their asses. They’ll all just lie and cover for each other and never face any consequences for the crimes they commit.

Full disclosure: I don’t like cops. I don’t trust them and I don’t call them when I’m in trouble. I’ve witnessed, first hand, far too many cases of police misconduct and brutality, and as I read the news every single day, my contempt for them is validated — by them. Today was no different. And don’t even try to convince me that there are still “good cops” out there because as long as the ones who aren’t actually killing innocent, unarmed people or otherwise abusing their authority continue to turn a blind eye or make excuses for the thugs in uniform, they are as complicit as said thugs in the crimes they commit.

But I digress.

So, Officer Holsworth was meeting his family for his birthday lunch at Olive Garden when he was approached by a hostess:

As I was sitting there waiting, one of the employees told me ” Sir, we don’t allow guns in here.” Now mind you I am in full police uniform and on duty. I actually thought it was a joke at first so I asked her ” Are you serious?” She replied back with ” Yes”. So I told her ” well I can leave I guess.” She then replied back ” yes please leave”

Did Holsworth ask for a manager to help clear things up? No, he volunteered to leave and then went crying to Facebook, asking people to share his story to let “everyone know how this establishment is treating their local law enforcement.”

Mr. Holsworth, “this establishment” didn’t treat you or anyone else in any way at all. You didn’t give them a chance to! One hostess told you what the gun policy was and you offered to leave, by your own admission. You claim that you “posted on Facebook about [it] because [you] did not want other officers to be subjected to the same embarrassing situation.” And I’m calling bullshit!

This could have been easily and quietly resolved, never to happen again, if you had simply asked for a manager. You went to Facebook to get attention and probably to try doing a little damage control and garner sympathy for your profession. You are the one who took it to the media, and then had the nerve to say this in a follow-up statement:

I ask that the media and others respect my privacy and devote their attentions to altering the general narrative about police officers in a more positive direction so this type of situation does not occur in the future.

See? Damage control for the profession. It’s almost as if Holsworth didn’t want the issue resolved amicably. It seems that he saw an opportunity to make a fuss and have his moment in the spotlight to play the victim and whine about the media’s “general narrative about police officers” and ask them to “alter” that narrative as if it’s somehow the media’s responsibility to repair the image of cops across the country — a horrifying image that cops in the United States have created for themselves!

So, Holsworth, how about appealing to your Brotherhood across the nation to stop acting like a bunch of goddamed gangsters and repair their own fucked up image? Or would that be too much like placing the responsibility exactly where the hell it belongs? Talk about victim blaming and shooting the messenger!

The knee-jerk responses in the comment sections of the news articles pissed me off even more. “Boycott Olive Garden”, and various expressions of police worship which always makes my skin crawl. The more people treat these guys like celebrities, the bigger their heads get and the more rounds they fire, and with no consequences. Cops are public servants! Stop the fucking drooling, people!

Michael Holsworth is a whiny bitch whose fragile ego was bruised when a little girl didn’t treat him like the superhero that he imagines he is. That is why he didn’t deal with the situation like a fully developed, emotionally stable adult. He’s not one. Any normal adult would have either left and taken their business elsewhere — without throwing a public tantrum — or asked to speak to a manager. But Holsworth is a cop, you see, so poor service in a restaurant is somehow newsworthy. But now he wants his privacy. And being a cop, he apparently thinks he’s entitled to run screaming into the media spotlight and then demand that the media respect his privacy. Self-important fucking ass wipe.

As to Olive Garden, fuck them for apologizing. I may very well boycott them just for that. Holsworth made absolutely no effort to resolve the matter right then and there, but instead took it public without even giving management a chance. If anything, Holsworth owes Olive Garden an apology for blowing such a petty isolated incident completely out of proportion! I’m sick to death of businesses falling all over themselves to kiss a bunch of smelly cop ass. But they do it because they worry that if they don’t, the cops won’t do their jobs if ever called to their establishments. And the sickening part is that they’re probably right, which would further validate my distrust and contempt for police.

In closing, I challenge Michael Holsworth to support his claim that he sees this kind of thing happen “all over the United States”. If Mr. Holsworth can cite even half as many cases of shit like this as I can of police killing unarmed, innocent people across the nation, I will chop off my right index finger and post a video of the amputation for your viewing pleasure. Or perhaps Michael Holsworth would like to alter his own bullshit narrative to include some actual facts. But I wouldn’t count on it.

Michael Holsworth