I felt a pain in my chest and tears in my eyes when I read this:
In order to be certain that God doesn’t exist, you have to possess a godlike mental capacity – the ability to be 100% certain. A human can’t be 100% certain about anything. Our brains aren’t that reliable. Therefore, to be a true atheist, you have to believe you are the very thing that you argue doesn’t exist: God.
Why should this induce such an emotional response? It’s a very common, done-to-death argument against atheism. It should be rolling off my back by now, shouldn’t it? And it does when it comes from random theists on the internet. But do you know who said it this time?
I’m not sure where to go from here. Can I carry on liking Dilbert? Do I renounce my love and admiration for him and his creator? Can I keep my copy of The Dilbert Principle? If not, can I just sell it in a yard sale or donate it to the public library, or do I have to destroy it to avoid being complicit in the advancement of this evil-doer’s comic strips?
Well, I suppose if I’m still willing to see Religulous after hearing Bill Maher blathering like he’s deranged (thanks Postman!), surely I can keep a book that I already have, and read a comic strip that doesn’t cost me anything.
I’m a little worried about what Richard Dawkins will think of my decision because I don’t know if he has the authority to excommunicate people. Now, I know what you’re thinking: What self-respecting atheist doesn’t know something like that, right? And I haven’t even read The God Delusion!
But more importantly, I hope Charles Darwin isn’t turning in his grave (he is still dead, right?). I’d hate to disturb the rest of such a great prophet. I mean, what if he can turn me into a chimp or a lemur or something? Would I have to move to Madagascar?
Well, these are all risks I’m willing to take. Please keep me in your
prayers labs… no. Dream about me? Shit. Just keep reading my blog (and try to bring a four-leaf clover or rabbit’s foot with you, just in case) as I embark on the courageous journey of testing the powers of high-ranking atheists and the Father of Evolution (Call me a maverick).