Growing Pains

In three weeks, my son will begin his first year of middle school. He’s looking forward to it, and I wish I could say that I am too. But I’m terrified. Every time we pass by the school he’ll be attending, I notice how… big it looks. I hadn’t noticed it last year. It was just the middle school; it didn’t have anything to do with me. Denial?

The kids I’ve seen coming and going from the campus look so grown up compared to my son, but maybe that’s just my perspective. Am I still seeing a baby where other people see a developing preteen? Probably.

I actually had to buy him some Oxy Daily Wash and spot treatment. Not that he doesn’t have beautiful skin, but he was starting to get a few blemishes and wanted to nip it in the bud. Good for him! But it was just another reminder of how fast he’s growing up. It seems like we went from buying training pants to acne medicine in the blink of an eye.

The thing that I’m worried most about is transportation to and from school.

Last year, he rode the school bus, which picked him up right at the corner of our block. I could watch from the window as he boarded the bus. After that, I knew he was OK. If anything happened, I would be notified right away. This year, though, he can’t ride the school bus because the middle school is less than a mile from our house. Since I don’t have a car, he can either ride the city bus, which he can catch just around the corner, or walk.

I want him to ride the bus. He wants to walk. That scares the shit out of me!

The street he would have to walk down is quite busy, but there’s sidewalk (pavement for you Brits!) all the way, and no major streets to cross. His friend who lives across the street is one year ahead of him, so he attended the same middle school last year and started walking it about half way through the year. They could walk together, and they’ll probably be just fine. I’m just… not ready for this.

These growing pains are killing me. Don’t they have a pill for this yet? Or was that Valium?

But I have to let go a little at a time. He’s been walking alone to nearby shops for nearly a year now. The school isn’t much farther away. It’s exactly 0.92 miles or 1.48 kilometers (yes, I mapped it). He’s shown himself to be responsible and trustworthy and I suppose it’s about time.

At least he’ll get the cell phones he’s been begging for, because he sure as shit won’t be walking that road without one!

Damn it!

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8 responses to “Growing Pains

  • truthwalker

    If you want to freak/calm yourself (depending on your disposition) look up some child death statistics. We usually fear what we have the closest emotional ties to rather than real risks. For instance, a lot parents ask baby sitters if there is a gun in the home,even though a child is orders of magnitude more likely to die in a house that has a pool than one that has a gun.

    Analyze the real (rather than percieved) risk factors and see if you are still worried, because I will almost guarantee he is safer walking to school that playing sports AT school.

  • Lottie

    You know what? I bet you’re right. I appreciate you making this point. I actually feel a little better just thinking about it from this perspective. But I’ll still take your advice, do some research and weigh the real risks against the things I fear the most.

    Thanks for commenting. πŸ˜€

  • Mike

    Honey, he’s going to be fine. He’ll have his friend with him on the way back, and it’ll be just fine. It’s all part of his growing up.

  • Lottie

    I know. I just can’t help worrying. At the same time, I can’t let fear rules our lives.

    But he’s getting a cell phone.

  • Selena

    Can you get him a cell phone so he can call you when he makes it to school safely?

  • Lottie

    Yeah, that’s what I’ve decided to do. Then I don’t have to panic all day.

  • Selena

    “But he’s getting a cell phone.”

    LOL πŸ˜†

    I didn’t see that 😳

  • Lottie

    That’s OK. Easy to overlook at the bottom of comments.

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