Love You Long Time?

I don’t usually critique other blogs here at Rambling On, but I recently came across one that is so simultaneously hilarious and disturbing that I feel I must share. The fact that its author will not allow me to comment there was definitely a deciding factor in my decision to write about it here. As anyone who knows me can testify, I am not one to go quietly.

Before I get to the deleted comment that prompted this post, I would like to address a few things that I probably would have let slide if Jessica Hope Leahy had been honest and open-minded enough to discuss my comment rather than deleting it like a narrow-minded coward.

The title of the blog is Jessica Hope Leahy’s Blog. The following is a quote from her About page:

Side effects of visiting this blog include, an open mind( Oh No!), nausea and vomiting, and a sense of humor.

[emphasis mine]

Apparently the author didn’t experience all the same “side effects” that she expects her readers to.

Jessica is a journalism student who will be graduating soon, and her blog is part of an assignment to that end. I find this disturbing in more ways than one, but I will begin where the author did – with the URL:

loveyoulongtime.wordpress.com

Now, I’m not absolutely certain about this, but I’d venture a guess that studying to become a journalist would include, in large part, learning to do research. Although I’ve never had any formal training in the art of research, I was able to find the origin of the phrase “love you long time” with one quick Google search. Actually, I already knew the origin; I just looked it up so I could provide a link here.

Before I get to that, allow me to point out that the subtitle of Jessica’s blog is Dedicated to Life In Love- A Bloggers Guide to Relationship 101. The following is another quote from her About page:

This blog will be dedicated to life in love,a bloggers guide to long term relationships, the ups the downs and all that stuff that falls in between.

Some of you may already be laughing your arses off, having already picked up on why I find this a point of interest, and difficult to reconcile with Jessica’s chosen URL.

The phrase, “me love you long time” is a line from a Dirty Rap (also known as also known as booty rap, porn rap, or sex rap) song entitled Me So Horny, by 2 Live Crew. The title of the album was As Nasty As They Wanna Be.

It gets even better, though:

The chorus of the song was sampled from the Stanley Kubrick film Full Metal Jacket. In the movie, UK actress Papillon Soo Soo, credited as “Da Nang Hooker” speaks the lines:

Hey baby, you got girlfriend Vietnam? Me so horny. Me love you long time.

Wikipedia

So Jessica chose the line of a hooker trying to pick up a John (or in this case, Joe) as the URL for her blog which she describes as a guide to long-term relationships.

Is it just me?

The next thing I would like to address is something I usually try to avoid criticizing, but this person has presented herself as someone who will soon graduate college with plans to become a professional journalist. As part of a journalism assignment, Jessica has created a blog from which she dispenses advice, and critiques other people’s relationships. Considering these two points, I think Jessica should be prepared to receive advice and criticism as well. So here goes:

Spell check, girl! Good grief!

Now, I realize that poor spelling does not necessarily indicate low intelligence; that’s not what I’m getting at with this. But as a future journalist, I would suggest learning to use a spell checker. It’s built in to most word processors, as well as your WordPress editor. Perhaps one of your professors could recommend a class?

As to the quality of writing, here is a small sample:

Hi everyone! Well.. what can I really say? I’m the least internet savvy person you will ever encounter so bare with me on this brand new endeavour. This blog is an assignment from an online journalism class I am taking right now, but in all honesty I cant wait to begin! This blog will be dedicated to life in love,a bloggers guide to long term relationships, the ups the downs and all that stuff that falls in between.

I am a 21 year old girl, who enjoys living life, writing, and has high aspirations as far as her future is concerned. I am Almost…ALMOST done with college and all that it has to offer, and am currently a year into the most serious relationship of my life. I am no expert. There was never a degree earned on my behalf in romance 101and Oprah has never asked me on her show to share my stories on this topic (she doesn’t know what’s good for her). However I have been cheated on loved and lied to in the past and I am a firm believer in learning from experience.. and that my fellow internet stalkers, bloggers and of course Professor Mark Berkey-Gerard…I have.

I hope while blogging about this topic, to not only to interest others, but to learn more about myself and my relationship as well. So buckle your seat belts and hold on tight.. this should be interesting!

About Me And This Blog

And this:

ATTENTION: As I mentioned in the beginning of this endeavour, I am not technologically savvy. That said again, if your reading my blogs and you have noticed those little boxes or question mark thingers in the writing, your not the only one. I have been sitting here poking my eyeballs out trying to figure out how to get rid of them! So my sincerest apologies, I know its annoying. But the reading is hopefully worth it, so continue please! It will hopefully be fixed by Monday! Thanks- Jess

Alert

Is this seriously the writing of a soon-to-be graduate of journalism school? Please tell me where to enroll – I have a free weekend I’d like to use to earn my Ph.D.

Jessica, dear, please find the apostrophe on your keyboard. And you might ask one of your professors to explain the difference between your and you’re, not to mention there, their, and they’re. In fact, while you’re at it, find a dictionary and look up bear and then bare. And by all means, have someone proofread and edit your posts: it’s something every good and responsible journalist does.

Now that I have all the preliminary stuff out in the open, I would like to move on to the deleted comment that prompted this post. The title of the post I commented on is Im A Creepy Neighbor… Call Me Gladys Kravitz (Yes, I know there should be an apostrophe in I’m, but it’s Jessica’s title, so…). Jessica opens with the following line:

Just like the fictional character, Gladys Kravitz, that starred in the comedy, “Bewitched,” I have been a creepy neighbor.

I won’t argue with the last part of that sentence, but I would like to take another small detour, if you’ll bear with me.

First of all, characters don’t star in anything; the actors and actresses who portray them do. Secondly, the actresses who portrayed Gladys Kravitz did not star in Bewitched; on the contrary, Gladys Kravitz was a relatively minor character. The stars of Bewitched were Elizabeth Montgomery, Dick York, Dick Sargent, and Agnes Moorehead.

Again: research.

Bewitched was one of my favorite television programs when I was a little girl. I loved the character of Samantha Stephens, played by the star of the show, Elizabeth Montgomery, so I couldn’t bear to overlook Jessica’s error in that regard. Thank you for indulging me. Now, on with the show:

In this particular post, Jessica discusses how, for about a year, she spied on a couple that lived across the street from her. She says that when the weather was nice enough to leave the windows open, she began to hear the couple fighting. One day, a moving truck came and the man moved out, leaving the woman there alone. While I admire Jessica’s sympathy for the woman, something she said jumped out at me, and I decided to comment. Jessica said:

As I look at her windows still open, and her dog in the backyard, it doesn’t seem fair (for her) that life is going on around her, while her world is probably falling apart.

My reply:

Or maybe she kicked his butt out, breathed a sigh of relief when he pulled out of the driveway, and is now dancing a jig of glee.

One has to assume an awful lot about people to think that someone’s life will fall apart due to a break up or even divorce. Not all relationships are healthy, and it’s not always a tragedy when people break up. Sometimes it’s the best thing that can possibly happen; sometimes the parties involved are actually happy about it.

If I may be so bold, the worst thing people can do in giving advice to others is to assume they know how others feel. Even if I’ve experienced something which appears from my perspective to be the same as what someone else is going through, that person’s perspective may be totally different.

Eavesdrop all you want, but I doubt you were there 24/7.

One might think that an educated, open-minded person, committed to understanding relationships and helping people work through them, would be willing to discuss this. But Jessica promptly deleted my comment. I suspect because it challenged her thinking and preconceived ideas about life and love, and she simply is not up to the challenge.

Jessica does not appear to be interested in what makes people tick in relationships, but in slapping any old thing on a WordPress blog and getting credit for a course that doesn’t require her to think about a damn thing she writes. This is not the making of a responsible journalist, if you ask me.

Jessica has written several posts that I would like to address as time permits. You might call this the start of a series. Stay tuned!

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11 responses to “Love You Long Time?

  • garymurning

    You know, Lottie, I tend to feel that this is more an indictment of these so-called journalism courses than of Jessica herself. Yes, there’s a surprising naïvete to her writing — but I wonder if that doesn’t stem from the “give me your money, yes you are a journalist”-approach of many of these sorry excuses for journo courses.

    I’ve seen similar with creative writing courses. I knew a girl (well, woman, but she wrote like a girl!) with a Masters in CW and the novel she wrote and which I critiqued was… utterly, utterly appalling. And she had no idea. Why? Because writing it had counted towards her MA, so it must be good.

    The upshot is, though, if Jessica doesn’t learn the lessons the blogoshere will teach her and respond to the challenges, she’ll never amount to anything as a journalist. These are the real lessons. Not the crap they teach in the classroom.

    And we don’t charge a penny!

  • Lottie

    Hi Gary! Thanks for sharing your experience and insight. I’ll definitely keep it in mind from now on when dealing with Jessica.

    I agree that there is much to be learned from blogs, discussion forums, and the like. I have learned a lot in the eight years I’ve been online, and I continue to learn every time I log on. In fact, I learned something from you just now. Glad to hear you won’t be sending me a bill.

    😉

  • garymurning

    Now, Lottie, you really must bear in mind, I might be wrong. 🙂 As difficult to imagine as that might be. But even if I’m right, it doesn’t in any way devalue what you have said on this — because the reality is that we as individuals are responsible for the quality of education we receive, at that level, at least, and if Jessica chooses to ignore input that could help her… well, the buck ultimately stops with her. She’s has choices. Time will tell how wise she is in making them.

  • Lottie

    Gary? Wrong? I won’t even consider it.

    Seriously, though, I agree with you. Learning to accept constructive criticism is vital to Jess’s (or anyone’s) career as a journalist. I know I was a tad harsh, but I attribute that to being ticked off over having my comment deleted. lol

    Are you sure you’re not planning to send me a bill for all this?;)

  • leahyj81

    Hey everyone JESSSICAAAAA HERE!
    My,my, you seem to have a lot of time on your hands. For the RECORD, I can take it, I can also dish it. I just try not to let the negative comments on my page for now, seeming as though it is an assignment. It doesn’t mean that I didn’t think about your words, and further more, it doesn’t mean that you weren’t right.DOESN’T MEAN THAT I DIDN’T AGREE WITH YOU. Before I saw this, I was actually going to write you back when I had the time, and say that you could be right. Comming from a household where a BREAK-UP was a positive thing, I would have had no problem agreeing with you. It seems like you need your ego stoked a bit anyways.
    The fact that you have gone above and beyond to make “fun” of a college girls blog page, doesn’t say much for you.
    I am a Journalism student. I had the opportunity to break the mold and do something other than politics and hard news here. It is just me taking a stab at something different. If I listened to “rap,” maybe I would have came across the lyrics,that you SAY, my URL stemmed from. It was a fun URL. Something that I thought was catchy. Is that a crime?
    If my views (on something that I witnessed first hand) dont meet yours. Call it a day. Why write about me? You do not know me. To write so harshly,and make fun of everything I have done on here, is a sad attempt at filling time.
    I didn’t allow a comment. The world must be ending now.
    I am not one to have arguments “virtually,” they seem a tad childish. I will say this. This blog is an experiment. I write about my own experiences, and see what else I can find for others. I say MANY times, that I am not an expert, never claimed to be, just trying to be vocal. Trying something out. That is all.
    I am not trying to be a “hard” journalist. It’s a relationship blog for crying out loud. Spelling errors, mistakes, blogs thrown up just to meet a deadline…sure. Like many other college students, I am taking 6 classes.
    I appreciate your dedication. Thanks for making a kids blog the center of your world. Go pick on someone your own size. I will e-mail you when I take this blog down at the end of the semester, so you can follow my next move.

    Jess

  • leahyj81

    wait wait,, I said stoked and not stroked! sorry !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Lottie

    Well, hello gorgeous! That certainly didn’t take long. Nice to see you here.

    I thought about addressing your post point by point, but I think I’ll just allow it to stand and speak for itself. I wouldn’t expect you to understand addressing things on principle anyway. And, sadly, the irony of your own post seems to be a bit over your head.

    But, hey… thanks for dropping by and validating every point I made about you. You’re a real doll! *smooch*

  • garymurning

    Jessica,

    There are lessons to be learned, don’t let your stubbornness get in the way.

    The fact is, there is nothing “virtual” about this. The blogoshere is an extension of the world we live in — the world where we all have and are entitled to an opinion. Lottie has raised some valid points and you could learn a lot from her. That is what this whole experience is about.

    You are well within your rights to delete whatever comments you like on your blog. It’s your blog. But bear in mind, it will piss some people off, and they may respond on their own blogs. You refer to yourself as a “kid”; you aren’t. You’re 21. An adult in a world of adults sharing ideas and clashing. The minute you started blogging, you became fair game.

    Embrace it, learn from it — and don’t underestimate the importance of the blogoshere. A lot of good journalism goes on here. And a lot of good people say it as they see it.

  • Mike

    If I listened to “rap,” maybe I would have came across the lyrics,that you SAY, my URL stemmed from. It was a fun URL. Something that I thought was catchy. Is that a crime?

    I recommend this site, Jessica, for every time you say something this stupid.

  • leahyj81

    I totally agree with you that say the bloggingphere is for journalism! Journalism and much much more. It is a world that I have just been introduced to, and I have to say, am loving. I have seen and witnessed great things being said on here. I have learned from it. Thank you for your thoughts.
    Mike. I am far from stupid. I am graduating in 3.5 years with a double major and a 3.6 GPA. Twisting my words to make me look bad isn’t kind. I do not listen to rap music, never have. Not because I don’t care for it, I just never have.
    It really is just as simple as that. I meant no harm. Just was trying to write freely.

  • Lottie

    I am graduating in 3.5 years with a double major and a 3.6 GPA.

    Yeah, and we’ve seen the quality of work that got you there.

    Twisting my words to make me look bad isn’t kind.

    Honey, no-one has to twist your words to make you look bad. In fact no-one has to do a damn thing to make you look bad. You’ve mastered that task all by yourself. That’s why I didn’t bother dissecting the idiotic rant you posted to me.

    I do not listen to rap music, never have. Not because I don’t care for it, I just never have.

    Boy, I could almost hear it whooshing right over somebody’s pretty little head.

    Tip for Jessica: Try reading all the words. 😉

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